Your What Hurts?: Conan get a show on a channel not named Fox

I am an admittedly biased Conan fan. (Fuck Jay Leno) I feel I'm allowed since I can actually remember 1990's Conan, and vividly remember being thrilled that a "Simpsons" writer would be getting his own show. So I was very excited when someone told me they announced his new show for the fall. "Oooo, Fox finally got their boy-wonder back. Or maybe even personal dark-horse Comedy Central finally wised up and made him a offer," I thought. But no.
(I got tickets, suck it!)

The station that won Conando's services for the fall is:
(I like how their slogan is exactly like my sarcastic reply upon hearing the news. Somewhere, George Lopez is crying into a tequila.)


Your what hurts?